The Sticky Situation

Chapter 4

They paused the X-Files DVD partway through the "Rain King" episode so that Grissom could microwave some more popcorn. As he lumbered off into the kitchen, Sara and Greg did their best to stretch their stiff limbs.

"It it just me," Greg pondered, "or does Mulder get into more embarrassing situations than most people?"

"Well, he does have more opportunities," Sara yawned. "What with the aliens and mutants and supersoldiers and all."

"But Scully doesn't even go through a tenth of what Mulder goes through. And they're in the same job."

"Maybe Scully's embarrassment is being saddled with the FBI's running joke as a partner."

"I don't know," Grissom said, appearing in the doorway. "To me, she's just the type that doesn't rattle."

"Like you," Greg said, leaning his head down to pop a mini-corndog into his mouth. It was Grissom who'd come up with the idea of putting finger food on a tall pedestal plate, so that Greg could eat without being fork-fed. "I don't think I've ever seen you embarrassed, boss."

"Oh, I've had my share of moments," he replied mildly.

"Like what?"

"Just. just moments."

Sara coughed into her hand, a noise that sounded suspiciously like "Weldenberger."

"Oh, yes, let's bring that up again," Grissom sighed.

"It was funny," she replied, biting her lip to hide her smile.

"The Weldenberger case last month?" Greg cocked his head, intrigued. "What was embarrassing about that?"

"Nothing."

"But-"

"Nothing was embarrassing."

"But Sara said-"

"Grissom got an erection at the crime scene," Sara burst out, then clamped a hand over her mouth.

Grissom glared at her. "See, the hand over the mouth thing only works if you do it before talking."

Greg's jaw hung open. "You got an erection at a-"

"It's not how it sounds."

"Good, because it sounds-"

"It's not." Hearing the ding of the microwave, Grissom disappeared to retrieve the bag of popcorn.

Once he was out of earshot, Sara leaned back, whispering, "It's exactly how it sounds."

"Okay," Grissom said shortly, returning and throwing the bag on the coffee table. "Sara, tell him the story."

"Why me?"

"Because you brought it up in the first place, and now I look like a pervert."

"I'm sorry," she said, grabbing the bag of popcorn and tearing it open. "Really, I am. It's just that we've been watching TV for eighteen straight hours, and I'm tired, and my butt hurts, and I've eaten about fifteen pounds of sugar and drunk four Coronas, and-"

"Just tell the story."

"Okay."

Greg settled back against the sofa, giving her his full attention.

"The Weldenberger case came right after that triple homicide at the Bellagio," she began.

Grissom nodded. "Which, if you remember, came right after the-"

"Do you want me to tell this story or not?" She gave him a glower that quickly morphed into a grin. "In any case, Grissom and I had been working for about ten days straight, and our breaks for sleep hadn't overlapped. So it'd been a while since we'd really seen each other."

"Naked," Greg supplied.

"Thank you, Greg, because that needed to be clarified. Anyway, I got to the scene, and Grissom assigned me to the blood trail. We couldn't find one initially, but for Bob Peters to drag all those bodies down to the basement. we knew there had to be a trail somewhere."

"So you broke out the luminal."

"Yup. Started in the basement, where all the bodies were buried. I figured I'd work my way backwards to find the source. Meanwhile Grissom was working on recovering evidence from the bodies. You want to take it from here, hon?"

Grissom raised his eyebrows. "So now I can contribute?"

"Be my guest."

"Well," Grissom said, shifting in his seat. "You'll have to understand, Sara was down to her last pair of spare shorts at work."

Greg whistled, slowly. "The really short ones that hug her-"

"Yes, those. And she was on her hands and knees, spraying."

"Say no more." Greg huffed out a breath. "You're only human, Grissom."

"Problem was, it wouldn't go down," Sara said, swallowing a giggle. "Not for forty-five minutes. And he made me keep everyone else out of the basement in the meantime, because he didn't want them to think he was getting aroused by all the dead bodies."

"So you see?" Grissom said, reaching for a slice of pizza. "I've had my share of embarrassing moments, just like you."

"Oh really," Greg replied dryly.

"Yes, really."

"Just like me."

"Just like you."

"Hey, Griss, I have to pee, do you mind getting Sara's antique tongs so you can fish out my junk and-"

"Okay, maybe not just like you."

o-o-o-o-o

They arrived at the crime lab just after five-thirty. Grissom helped the pair out of the back seat, then led them into the building. By this point, Sara and Greg had become pretty good at walking together. It was like a three-legged race, really. Except, you know, with an extra leg thrown in there.

Hodges met them in the hallway. "Ah, Grissom. Glad you're here too. The solution - or dissolution, if you will - is ready. Right this way." They headed for the trace lab. "You'll notice that the halls are empty. I cleared out all the personnel who were trying to get a glimpse of Sara and Greg."

"Thank you," Grissom said, surprised.

"And I confiscated a camera from Nick Stokes."

"You'll need to give that back to him."

"He was planning on taking a photo with it!"

"That's usually what one does with a camera, David. You need to return it." Grissom glanced over his shoulder at Sara and Greg, then added, "You can wait till after they're unstuck, though."

They arrived at trace, where the solution was set out on a counter. "I tested it on some of Burrow's superglue earlier," David said, grabbing some swabs. "Dissolved the glue completely, and had no negative effects when applied to human skin."

"You applied it to your skin?" Sara asked, oddly touched.

"God no, I put some on an intern's arm. I have very sensitive skin, Sara, there's no way I could test it on myself."

"Let's get to it," Grissom said, looking anxious.

Hodges dipped a swab into the solution and got to work, applying it to Greg's hands and Sara's waist. Slowly, Greg's hands came detached.

"Oh, thank god," Greg muttered, flexing his fingers.

Sara stretched, cracking her back and groaning in appreciation.

"Looks like you're all set," Hodges said finally, rubbing the last of the solution from Sara's waist.

"Thank you for your help," Sara said, flashing him a grateful grin. "You've been really nice about this."

"You know, if Greg had been wearing gloves at the crime scene like he was supposed to, this never would have happened."

"And, now you're back to being Hodges."

The threesome walked down the hall, buoyed by relief.

"I'm going to make myself a big pot of my best coffee," Greg said, still flexing his hands over and over. "And then I'm going to-"

"We know," Grissom and Sara said in unison, shaking their heads.

"Thanks, by the way," Grissom added, "for not doing that at the house."

"Thank you for not giving me high-fiber food."

"Hey, you're back!" Nick caught sight of them from the break room and bounded toward them, a wide smile plastered across his face. "The unsticking go okay?"

Sara nodded. "There's nothing left a shower won't rinse away."

"Where were you guys, anyway? Everyone had all these wild theories about where you went, what you two were doing."

Grissom and Sara looked at each other, stricken, but before they could say anything, Greg spoke up. "We ended up checking into a hotel, actually. We talked Grissom into coming with us so that he could help me use the bathroom, and other than that, we just watched a lot of TV and ordered a bunch of room service."

"Oh," Nick replied, disappointed. "That's not all that exciting."

"Nope," Greg agreed. "Hey, I'm in the mood to use my hands tonight. You up for shooting some pool?"

"Sounds good. Let's go ask Warrick if he wants in."

Grissom let out a breath of relief as Greg started down the hall after Nick. After a few steps, though, Greg stopped and turned around. "Hey Sara?"

"Yeah?"

He grinned at her shyly. "Glue or no glue, I've always got your back." He turned and jogged after Nick, leaving Grissom and Sara to stare after him.

"This was a weird couple of days," Sara said finally.

"Yes, yes it was."

"So." she said, turning to him and cocking an eyebrow.

"So?"

"You know what I'm in the mood for tonight?" She winked at him broadly.

"Chess?"

"No."

"Parcheesi?"

"No."

"Sanitizing your tongs?"

"Damn right. We'll stop for cleaning solution on the way home." She headed for the exit, stopping when she realized he wasn't following. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," he said, falling into step beside her. "I was just thinking."

"About what?"

"About how I'm happy to be stuck with you."

The End